Ah the dessert course...

First off, I'd like to remind everyone that the first 2 courses were not a total fail, then came dessert, and oh what a dessert it was. We made Mocha-nut Cream Cups which, despite having the word Mocha in the title do not have chocolate as an ingredient anywhere. But we figured with whipped topping, sugar free cheesecake pudding mix, and coconut extract, it must still be awesome right?! Well, not so much. The directions say to mix whipping creme, coconut milk, espresso powder, and coconut extract together, then sprinkle (sprinkle as opposed to unceremoniously dumping) sugar-free cheese cake pudding mix over the mixture and beat with a hand mixer until "medium stiff beaks" form. I'm sure you are all reading this and thinking beaks?! Medium stiff beaks? What does that entail exactly?

Well after about 10 minutes beating this coconutty mixture on low speed with the hand mixer, you realize 3 things: 1. There is no such thing as medium stiff beaks, 2. There must be an unfortunate (read drunken) typo in the recipe, and 3. I could stand here all night and attempt to whip this light brown mush into medium stiff beaks and it's never gonna happen. Ever.

So being a practical person, I gently folded in the shredded coconut and put it in the fridge for a while, hoping that refrigeration would somehow magically form the beaks. After the pre-made piecrust cooled, and after a few drinks, I placed the brown coconut goo into the cups with a healthy dollop of whipped topping and added a delicate sprinkling(this recipe is all about the sprinkling) of toasted coconut to the top and served it up to our friends.

Well, first let me say this dessert was kinda pretty. On the glass cake plate it looked really nice...edible even. But then came the taste test, and this is where it all went downhill. At first I tasted the whipped topping, then the pie crust and thought this is not so bad! 3 out of 3! But then the coconut extract finish kicked in. And then came the sudden realization that there was an uncomfortable amount of shredded coconut in these cups. It was an odd texture and a bad aftertaste. I took 2 bites and realized that the only things I liked about this dessert were the pre-made pie crust and the whipped topping, and I wasn't alone. Most of our guests proceeded to scoop the whipped topping off the top of the goop in the cup and leave the rest, for fear of getting that weird flavor back in their mouths. Jillian ate most of hers, but

lets be honest, that girl is a trooper, with a much higher tolerance for nasty than the rest of us.

Having decided to cut our losses, we moved onto the Darling Clementine to round out the evening, because nothing says consolation prize like 2 cups of orange sherbet, orange liqueur, and a cup of vanilla vodka. Once all of the parts of the blender were located, I must say, this drink was not half bad. Maybe it was the wine, maybe it was the Tall Dark and Handsome, but I will say I liked it. It tasted like a creamsicle. A boozy creamsicle. If you, like most of us, occasionally have to sit through awkward family gatherings on summer afternoons but don't want to hug a bottle of gin like a security blanket in order to cope, I would highly recommend this drink.

Until next time, keep it simple, keep it sweet, and always keep your liquor cabinet fully stocked.