Aye Caramba!

Last week we posted three of the six russipies braved by our friends during Joey's South of the Border Sodalishous Fiesta. Today, we write about the other three. First, there was the bland, dry Margarita Chicken. This was chased down with watery Boraccho Beans, and we rounded out the meal with the surprisingly tasty Black Bean Quesadillas.

Since the Quesadilla was sodalishous, I want to start with that. You spread a layer of beans, then a layer of jar salsa over a burrito-size flour tortilla. You sprinkle it wish Mexican-style shredded cheese and then put another tortilla on top and bake it in a 400 degree oven for around 15 minutes till the tortilla is crisp and brown. You take the quesadilla pizza out and cut it into four slices (can this even be called a recipe?). As a dipping sauce, you take 1/2 c. prepared guacamole and mix it with 2T. sour cream. Another topping to dip the quesadilla into is the premade salsa. Although I hold great disdain for premade salsa and guacamole, I do believe it is pretty hard to mess up a quesadilla. As you can tell from the picture, Lindsay made a massive platter full of this quesadilla appetizer and it was the first thing to go....seriously. Why Aunt Sandy decided to mix guacamole and sour cream (something I usually loathe), I'll never know. But, this was the best thing of the night (probably because it was the only russipe with store bought ingredients that weren't modified). Perhaps she thought this extra step would make it taste homemade....it didn't. But, I must confess- this was delicious (compared to everything else).

Onto the flavorless Margarita Chicken. The russipe is simple enough. You marinate 4 bone-in chicken breasts, for 2 hours in: 1 can frozen margarita mix, 2/3c. tequila, 1/2c. chopped cilantro and 2T. chicken seasoning. Then you grill the chicken till it's cooked (30 minutes). The chicken was kinda dry after 30 minutes, and the flavor didn't permeate the skin so the chicken didn't taste like much of anything, except for bland chicken breasts. Where is the salt and pepper? Yes, there was a season packet used, but come on! Salt and Pepper is a basic essential when grilling chicken and Aunt Sandy usually over-salts EVERYTHING! This was bland. Very... very... bland. That being said, we cut it up, put it into tacos and smothered the flavorless poultry in guacamole, tossed in some salsa and sprinkled on some cheese. Then it was tasty. I am surprised Aunt Sandy wasted a whole 2/3c. of tequila on such a tasteless russipie. For shame, Aunt Sandy! Our tip to you semihomemakers out there- save the tequila for the margaritas.

Finally, was the Boraccho Beans. In all honesty, I thought this russipe looked fairly tasty; I have made drunken beans before and they turned out well. This however was not the case. Joey threw 2 cans of pinto beans, 1 can of diced tomatoes and green chiles, 1 can green chiles, 1/2c frozen diced onios, 1t. crushed garlic, 1 bottle mexican beer and 1/3c. "real" bacon bits into a pot, brought it to a boil and cooked the beans for 20 minutes. Then he stirred in 1/4c. cilantro and served it with lime wedges. As you can tell by the picture, the liquid did not cook down which I thought it should have. It looked like bean soup...very unappealing. And, the taste also left something to be desired. The bacon bits made this disgusting (I know, because Joey also made a batch of these beans vegetarian style for Liz (spoiled veggie eater!) which I thought were definitely more tasty). The original russipie tasted fake and processed- like salty, plastic bacon bit beans. Blech!

So after 6 Semi-russipes, one was delicioso (although I would challenge that the quesadilla does not count as an actual russipie), two were decent, one was bland and the other two were a complete waste of ingredients. I would call the South of the Border Party a hit! Pitchers of margaritas later, we all forgot that we had come over to sample Sandy's russipes. Until next time, remember to keep it peppered, keep it vegetarian, keep it a fiesta, and always keep it Semi-Edible!

Peaches y Crema

Hola! As stated in the last entry, our friend Joey wanted to host a Mexican Fiesta party, semi homemade style. As soon as he mentioned it, Liz and I jumped all over this opportunity. What better venue to get a huge amount of victims…er subjects….er friends to taste lots of Aunt Sandy’s good ol’ Mexican delicacies? After all, Mexican food is Sandy's favorite food so there were plenty of super simple russipies waiting for us to test. I brought a hot, semi-delicious pot of Creamy Green Chile Soup while Liz tackled what I feel was one of the grossest russipies to date: Halibut Tacos with Peach Salsa. For cocktail time Joey served up Cosmoritas.

Because cocktail time is the best time of the day, I'll start with the Cosmorita. You shake an ice filled martini shaker with 1 shot of tequila, a splash of lime juice and 2 shots cranberry. You strain the concoction into a glass and garnish with a lime wheel. This doesn’t sound that bad- and it wasn’t. If you haven’t guessed it by now, Aunt Sandy took most of the ingredients in a cosmopolitan and added tequila instead of vodka. How. Original. And if I liked tequila more, I probably would make this again. But I don't, so I wont. This is a strong tasting drink- we all passed around and sampled one glass as opposed to each of us drinking one and then being floored. Needless to say for the rest of the night, the rest of us stuck to margaritas, sangria and tecate.

My favorite item of the night (that was from a Semi-Russipe) was my Creamy Green Chile Soup. In a pot you boil 1 c. frozen chopped onions (this was our first russipe using frozen onions! I was so excited and can I just tell you they were super easy to find in the store), 1t. garlic, 1c. frozen corn, 2 cans diced green chile, 4c. chicken stock and 1tsp. Mexican seasoning. I could not find Mexican Seasoning (does it exist?)…just Mexican Taco mix, so I used that. While this boils, in another skillet you add 2Tbs butter, 1c. corn and 1 can green chiles. Then you add 1 package of fresh (gasp!) sliced mushrooms and sauté for 10 minutes. This is quite the complex russipe. The directions from there get kind of confusing. I deciphered them (and Liz corroborated my idea) to mean that you then puree the soup mix, and as the final steps add the sautéed vegetables, stir in ¾ cup crema and pepper the shit out of the soup to get a decent flavor (no salt necessary). There are warnings in the directions to keep the blender from blasting scalding soup into your eyes and all over the counter… heed these warning. Because even if you heed the warnings, the soup explodes. In all fairness I was running late, so I didn’t really let the soup cool before blending, but hey, I like to live on the wild side sometimes. This soup was fairly well received at the party once it was garnished with cilantro and cheese. Everyone said they would eat it again or would want to eat a bowlful of it. Liz didn’t like it, and though I thought the mushrooms were slimy- I enjoyed it. I took the leftovers home, added some chicken and had a couple delicious meals out of it. All in all, I would say this was not so super simple (considering the ease of her other russipies) but worth making.

Next was Liz’s heroic creation of Sandy’s Halibut Tacos with Peach Salsa. Now really, just looking at the title of this is deceiving. Sure there’s a slight hesitation at the thought of peaches on fish tacos, but mangos and pineapples have been successful, if not delicious, on tacos. And everyone loves fish tacos, verdad? Si. But then you learn that there’s allspice involved. And not just a pinch of allspice, but a whole heaping teaspoon! Ick times 5. But I am getting ahead of myself here. First, Liz took a pound of tilapia and marinated it in a packet of hot taco seasoning mix for 30 minutes. She chose to diverge from the russipe and use tilapia instead of halibut for two reasons. First, we are poor law students. And second, we aren’t about to waste good halibut on something as gross as this. The sodium infused fish is then grilled and put on corn tortillas. It is topped with coleslaw mix and the peach salsa. Despite the taco seasoning mix, this still sounds harmless, if not tasty. But no, the peach salsa is absolutely, without a doubt in my top 3 worst Semi-Edible dishes. You take 2c. mild chunky salsa, add 1c. chopped frozen peach slices and 1t. allspice. Aye dios mio!

First off, 99% of pre-made salsas are inedible to begin with... adding allspice and frozen peaches would make even homemade salsas inedible. Liz and I decided it smelled and tasted like old people and potpourri salsa. After we finished gagging and gulping down our margaritas to kill the aftertaste, we made sure everyone tried one bite before we ditched the salsa and ate the fish tacos plain or with guacamole. It was absolutely inedible and I am sorry I ever put that in my mouth.

There are three other sodalicious items made for the fiesta that we will post next week. In all honesty, they weren't bad. Although, in my opinion, nothing short of the Hot Crab Rangoon Dip can ever be as bad as that peach salsa. It gives me chills just thinking about it.

So until next time remember to keep it Mexican, keep it slimy, keep it allspice free, and always keep it Semi-Edible.

Semi-homemaker's entry!

Many apologies for such a late new entry. I am currently procrastinating studying for a midterm tomorrow and thought, what better way to delay studying than to post a long overdue semi-edible entry?! Today's entry is by our friend Joey, who had us over for a Semi-Homemade Mexican Fiesta Party last month (which we have yet to write about). Joey was so happy with the results of that party (hah) that he decided to try another super simple russipe. Here is his amazing review of what sounds so gross (despite it having 90 reviews and an unbelievable 5 star rating) I wish I had been there to try it:

After creating two horrible Sandra Lee dishes already (Margarita Chicken and Borracho Beans) I was reluctant to try another recipe. However, after visiting the Semi-Homemade homepage on FN, I saw a clip where she made Apple Maple Turkey Burgers with Maple-Dijon Sauce. I laughed at the simplicity of the recipe, yet I've been hankering for a turkey burger for a while and I decided to attempt another Aunt Sandy concoction.

The ingredients are simple enough, and I had most of them, but as I was in the grocery store buying the few extra items I needed, I quickly realized how different her recipes are from her show. For example, on the show, she specifically said to use "lean ground turkey" because if it is not "lean" then it is mixed with dark turkey meat. However, the recipe merely says "ground turkey breast." I have some experience cooking with ground turkey and I have never seen ground turkey "breast" only 97% and 99% lean ground turkey. Since the 97% was on sale, I purchased that. The recipe also calls for "poultry seasoning." I'm not sure what this seasoning is. I searched the spice aisle for at least 10 minutes before an employee noticed my perplexed face and asked if he could help. However, he could only point me to McCormick's rubs that seemed to be intended for grilled chicken. I even called upon a friend to see if she knew what it was. Alas, I decided to use the only chicken seasoning I know and trust - Adobo.

The patties are made with 1 1/4 lb. ground turkey, 1/4 c. bacon bits, 1/2 c. applesauce, poultry seasoning and 2 T. maple syrup. After combining all the ingredients, I became concerned about the consistency of the meat. It was too soft and I was concerned that the burgers would fall apart once I started cooking them. My better judgment told me to add an egg to keep it together, but instead I trusted Aunt Sandy and continued on as the recipe directed.

I do not have a grill, and the show uses what appears to be an indoor electric grill, so I used my cast-iron Ikea grilling pan, which I oiled and heated on medium heat. I put the burgers in the pan and cooked each side for about 7 minutes as directed.

While the burgers were cooking, I made the Maple-Dijon sauce. However, I found the sauce to be runny and pretty much tasting like sweet mayonnaise (it's mayo, mixed with dijon and more maple syrup). Once the burgers were cooked, I added a slice of tomato and some red onions as she did on the show. Then topped it with a "dollop" of the Maple-Dijon sauce.

Surprisingly, the burger was good! A little messy because the runny Dijion sauce drips as you eat it, but it was juicy and a little sweet, which was a pleasant addition to the bland flavor of a regular turkey burger. I would have to say that I may actually make these again sometime. However, I would probably add cheese to the burger - a Gruyere or muenster perhaps. My faith in Sandra Lee has been partially restored!